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Thread: Never Give Up

  1. #1
    I Am JEFIT Legend Deviation's Avatar
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  2. #2
    Experienced Member Mark Spivey's Avatar
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    Jun 2013
    Knoxville, TN
    Motivation to Never Give Up

    Well now… how shall I begin? I have been on the road to rebuilding my physical body since November 2012; that is when I decided that I had not been a good keeper of this body I have and had reached 268 pounds with an unknown percent body fat (I’m sure it was well into the 30’s, if not over). It came from eleven years of not doing anything to take care of myself and not eating properly, a long way from 158 pounds with 6-7% body fat in 2001 (marital issues, divorce, and depression provided the inspiration back then when I dropped from 238 pounds). This time I started out very slow with very small incremental changes to eating habits. In January 2013 I started using My Fitness Pal off and on. In February 2013 I joined a gym (Workout Anytime). By February I had made the decision to be fully committed to getting myself back to being healthy, taking time for me. This was partially inspired by my father’s death in January which was preceded by nearly a year of him struggling to just accomplish normal daily activities (such as getting out of bed, getting out of chairs, getting dressed, walking, etc.). Granted, he was in his later 80’s but the struggling he went through still made a profound impression on me.

    I started to use Jefit in June 2013 and it is now August 2013. I am making good progress toward my goals and I now weigh about 215 pounds and have about 22% body fat. The thing most people have noticed is while I’m losing fat I’m gaining muscle. Yep that’s right… I’m cutting and building at the same time. It’s not something that’s easy (that’s probably the biggest understatement of my life, It’s extremely difficult). My second wife (married since 2004) was supportive at first but now is seemingly more critical and less supportive. She has said things like: “you shouldn’t push yourself as hard as you do, you’re going to hurt yourself, you’re not in your twenties anymore, we just don’t seem to have much in common”, as well as saying things that allude to me having a mid-life crises. I know some of this may be coming from some insecurity she may have in seeing some serious physical changes in me. She is trying to better herself with Zumba and going to the gym but isn’t as driven as I am and she isn’t seeing the results she would like to see.

    Now to add a little perspective, I am very focused, intentional, and intense. I don’t live at the gym; actually I have worked my gym time such that when I go to the gym (three days a week for three and a half to four hours) it is at the same general time my wife goes to Zumba. She tried going to the gym with me but she said that she couldn’t work out with me because “you are too intense.” Yeah, I’m intense. I don’t think the gym is a social club, a casual meeting place, or a place to hang out. It is a tool for accomplishing physical goals and purposes. Nothing annoys me more than someone just sitting at a station playing Candy Crush Saga, Texting, Snap Chatting, etc. for five minutes between sets. Don’t get me wrong, I will take the time to assist others with spotting and have brief moments of conversation between exercises but I have a lot to accomplish in a very limited time. What I do in three days most people do in five to six days. This is due to me wanting to honor and maintain my marriage and relationship as well as other commitments while carving out time for myself (which I feel also feeds back into a better relationship by me being happy with myself and having a healthy outlet for stress).

    I’m not willing to just resign to the fact that I’m older and subsequently have lower goals because of it. I am an overachiever! Yes, I have high goals and work to achieve or exceed them. I am also a realist in that I know that I can only do so much so fast. I fully realize that I may not be able to push myself as hard as I could when I was in my 20s, 30s, or even 40s but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t push myself. Growth, gains, or weight loss only come from pushing the limits. The only failure I recognize is the failure to try (which is utter failure). If you try and don’t succeed in achieving your goals you pick yourself up, dust yourself off, evaluate what went wrong, make positive changes, and begin working at your goals again because you are an overcomer and not a quitter.

    So, here I am rapidly approaching the age of 53. I am lifting heavier than I have in my life to date. There are few people in the gym I go to that can go at the level I go (regardless of age). Yes, I am in intense pursuit of my goals. I strive for excellence and I’m not willing to give a mediocre effort. So yes, I am one of those annoying people that are giving it everything they have during their workout and I tend to grunt or make a little noise as I push my body to get those last couple of repetitions. Sorry about that folks, but I haven’t seen anyone with balls enough to say something to my face. The fact that I’m benching 470 pounds may have something to do with it. ;-) I want to live life to the full without ever saying: What if I had only tried a little harder? Seize the day and the opportunities you have! Give it your best effort! If you fall short make changes and try again!
    Last edited by Mark Spivey; 08-19-2013 at 06:07 PM.

  3. #3
    Member zekesoria's Avatar
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    Aug 2012
    Quote Originally Posted by Mark Spivey View Post
    Motivation to Never Give Up
    What if I had only tried a little harder? Seize the day and the opportunities you have! Give it your best effort! If you fall short make changes and try again!
    Inspired! I always enjoy your posts, it's folks like you sharing that keeps me motivated, THANKS!
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